


Love is Love

by sterekwolfstar



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-01
Updated: 2018-04-02
Packaged: 2019-04-16 19:48:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14172180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sterekwolfstar/pseuds/sterekwolfstar
Summary: Qui Gon and Obi Wan are college students in a relationship with each other. Qui Gon is out to his parents and has been for years. Obi Wan is very deep in the closet because his family is religious and homophobic. In this chapter, Obi Wan is starting to become frustrated at the great lengths of hiding his relationship





	1. Tired of Secrets

Qui Gon walked into the room that he shared with his boyfriend to find his boyfriend laying on his bed doing homework. "Hi Qui Gon," Obi Wan said brightly. 

"Don't you have your own bed to do your homework on," Qui Gon teased his boyfriend. Obi Wan laughed and sat up so Qui Gon could sit down beside him. 

"I do, but I haven't seen you all day and wanted to use yours. How was your class," Obi Wan asked as he closed his books. 

"Tiring. I hate night classes," Qui Gon responded with a sigh. "I kept thinking about my handsome boyfriend/roommate who I haven't seen since this morning." 

Obi Wan smiled and gave his lover a kiss. "At least you're done now."

"Yep. I'm going to go take a quick shower and then I'm all yours for the rest of the night," Qui Gon promised Obi Wan with a soft smile. 

Obi Wan smiled and stole one last kiss. While Qui Gon was in the shower Obi Wan thought about how much had changed in the last three years. Coming to college had given Obi Wan more freedom to be who he truly was. He grew up in a religious household where being gay was seen as the most unforgivable sin. Obi Wan had realized that he started liking guys when he was a junior in high school but never acted on those feelings because he knew his family would kick him out and he would be homeless. During the rest of his time in high school, he just spent his time focusing on his academics and baseball so he would have legitimate excuses as for why he didn't have a girlfriend. It had paid off because he ended up becoming valedictorian and received a full scholarship to college. He met Qui Gon at freshmen orientation and was immediately attracted to him. The two of them became good friends and during their sophomore year, their relationship turned into romance. Obi Wan had been hesitant to enter a relationship with Qui Gon for a while because he didn't think it was fair for Qui Gon to have to hide their relationship from almost everyone but Qui Gon had promised that he didn't mind because Obi Wan's safety of having to stay in the closet was more important to him than being able to flash their relationship in public. Even now, Qui Gon still doesn't mind. They did tell Qui Gon's parents after a while and they were very understanding and respectful of Obi Wan's decision to stay private. Qui Gon's whole family had been so supportive and loving that Obi Wan was jealous but Qui Gon had pointed out to him that as far as he was concerned, they would be there for Obi Wan if he needed anything. The past few weeks, however, Obi Wan started to feel even more frustrated about having to hide his relationship. He was in love with Qui Gon and he hated having to hide it. It wasn't fair to him or his lover. 

"Hey, earth to Obi Wan," Qui Gon teased as Obi Wan blinked at him. Obi Wan was so caught up in his thoughts he hadn't heard boyfriend get out of the shower or felt him join him on the bed. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Obi Wan lied. 

Qui Gon took Obi Wan's hand in his and squeezed it. "It's not nothing. What's up? If you don't want to talk about it I'll respect that." 

"I was just thinking about us and how it's not fair that we have to hide. I mean we're not really hiding much but we're not openly affectionate in public either. I know that's because of me and because of the fear of my parents finding out." 

"Love, that doesn't matter to me. Would it be nice to do more than just hold your hand in public sometimes? Sure but your safety is more important to me," Qui Gon responded as Obi Wan knew he would. 

"I know and I love you for that. I think it's time to change things though. I'm tired of having to keep us a secret. I want to tell my parents. It's about time I tell them. Maybe they will be more open minded now. I doubt it but you are too important to me to keep hidden anymore," Obi Wan said seriously. "I'm not saying I'm not scared because I'm terrified but if we've been talking about our future after we finish school next year, it's about time we say something to them. It's only a matter of time before things get out anyway." 

Qui Gon gave Obi Wan's hand a squeeze. "Are you sure about this? You have my support, either way, 100% and my home is open for you if they should kick you out. I hope that's not the case but from what you told me, it is a realistic option. My family always told me that if you do come out to them and they were to kick you out like you fear they have a room available for you."

"I love your family. They are the best and I am so grateful for them and you," Obi Wan told him giving him a kiss. 

Qui Gon hugged him tightly. "We love you." 

Obi Wan sighed. "We have a break coming up. I think I'm going to go home for once and tell them alone. I would love you there with me but I feel it's best that I do this alone. I don't know. I might change my mind before the break."

"Whatever your choice, I will respect and help you in any way I can my love," Qui Gon said caressing Obi Wan's cheek. "If you want me there for support I will be happy to support you. I do understand if you don't."

"It's not that I don't want you there. It's that I'm afraid of what they might say or do to you should you be there," Obi Wan said. "But we have a little bit of time to think things through. Right now, I just want to make love to my forever guy," Obi Wan said running his hand up and down Qui Gon's bare chest.

"I'm always up for that," Qui Gon responded with a kiss and smile.


	2. Anxious Obi Wan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The night before break and Obi Wan is reconsidering his decision to come out to his parents

For the past five minutes, Qui Gon has watched Obi Wan pace nervously back and forth in front of his bed. Qui Gon had tried to get Obi Wan to calm down but he wouldn't. 

"Am I making a mistake Qui," Obi Wan asked suddenly standing still in front of his lover.

Qui Gon took advantage of Obi Wan's brief moment of stillness to pull him on the bed with him. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to do," Qui Gon told Obi Wan softly. 

"I know," Obi Wan sighed. "But I have to. I am tired of hiding. It's so exhausting. I'd rather lose my family than continue to be someone I'm not. I can't post pictures of the two of us online without being petrified that they look like we're too close."

"I don't want to be the reason your family turns their back on you," Qui Gon whispered resting his forehead against Obi Wan's. 

"No. It won't be you that's the issue. My family needs to realize that you can't help who you fall in love with," Obi Wan told him softly, briefly giving Qui Gon a soft kiss. 

"No you can't," Qui Gon replied with a smile. "I love you so much. No matter what happens I'll be here."

"I know. Thank you for your patience and understanding. You have been the absolute best. I don't know how many other guys would be ok with their partner having to stay in the closet," Obi Wan told him.

Qui Gon softly wiped away the tears that were falling out of Obi Wan's eyes. "You are worth it. If you really love someone, you have to respect their wants and needs. Like I told you a thousand times before we started dating, your safety is important to me. More important than anyone else. No one should feel pressured to come out of the closet by their partner, at least that is my opinion." 

"You're the absolute best guy in the world," Obi Wan said before pulling Qui Gon in for a deep kiss. Talking was forgotten as they got undressed and made love.

"I don't know if I feel more or less anxious now," Obi Wan joked as Qui Gon held him close. 

Qui Gon laughed and pressed a soft kiss to Obi Wan's temple. "I hope a little less than you were before at least." 

Obi Wan smiled. "Yeah. A little less at least. Thanks for everything again." 

"You're an incredible guy Obi Wan. I'm lucky to have you," Qui Gon told him softly. 

"I don't understand how people can see this as wrong. The love we have for each other is just as real or special as a straight couple," Obi Wan told him as he ran his hand up and down Qui Gon's arm.

"I don't know love," Qui Gon responded. "Maybe they're just jealous." 

Obi Wan laughed. "Doubt it, but I don't know. I think I do know one thing. Tomorrow, I want you to drive me home and stay in the car while I tell my family. I don't think I trust myself to drive to your house after things go south and I expect things to go south. I know that I'm not going to be accepted and yet I'm still telling them because it's just something I have to do. Do you think you could do that for me?"

Qui Gon put his hand on Obi Wan's cheek. "I can definitely do that. Of course I hope things go well, but realistically I'm prepared to help comfort you afterwords in anyway I can." 

Obi Wan nodded. "Thank you. No matter what happens, thank you so much." 

"Anything for you my love." Qui Gon felt Obi Wan start to become anxious again so he did his best to calm his anxious mind.


	3. Coming Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Obi Wan comes out to his family

Friday morning, Obi Wan woke up earlier than when the alarm was expected to go off. He felt Qui Gon breathing softly beside him still fast asleep. He turned over in bed so he could stare at his sleeping lover. He was lucky to have Qui Gon in his life. Qui Gon made him feel comfortable and safe and loved. When the alarm went off, he quickly turned it off, smiling at his lover as he blinked a few times before opening his eyes. 

"Morning Qui," Obi Wan said softly. 

"Morning handsome," Qui Gon responded back with a smile. "How long you been awake?"

"A while," Obi Wan admitted.

"You ok," Qui Gon asked concerned.

"I'm just anxious but I still have to do it," Obi Wan said.

"How about we skip our classes this morning and just enjoy each other," Qui Gon suggested.

"What? Really," Obi Wan asked shocked.

"I'm not saying we should make a habit out of it, but today is going to be hard so I'm just suggesting a one time break. Besides, I know for a fact we're not the only ones who are skipping their classes today," Qui Gon told Obi Wan.

"I don't hate your suggestion," Obi Wan admitted. 

"Great," Qui Gon said with a smile. "I can love on you a while." 

Obi Wan had no objections to Qui Gon loving on him for a while. It was nice and he felt so much calmer afterwords. "Love you so much," Obi Wan said brushing a long lock of Qui Gon's hair out of his face. 

"Love you too." After a while of laziness and loving, they ended up going to grab lunch before heading towards Obi Wan's home. Obi Wan was visibly anxious and Qui Gon tried his best to speak comforting words to him. He also reminded him that he didn't have to do this.

"I know I don't have to but I do have to," Obi Wan told him. "It's necessary. I want to be free." 

Qui Gon parked on the side of the street in front of Obi Wan's house. "I don't know how long I'll be," Obi Wan told Qui Gon with a nervous sigh.

Qui Gon gave Obi Wan's hand a tight squeeze. "Take your time. Text me if you need me. I'm just right out here." 

Obi Wan smiled and leaned over to kiss Qui Gon's forehead. "Love you." 

"Love you too," Qui Gon replied heart breaking for what might happen to his lover. 

Obi Wan took one last deep breath before going inside. His parents were waiting for him because he texted them telling them what time they would be home. "Hi mom and dad," he told them nervously. He was greeted with hugs. Obi Wan never went home unless the dorm was closing and he was forced to. Although he did spend a few days with Qui Gon and his family over Thanksgiving and Christmas breaks.

"What's on your mind? You've had us all worried when you said you had something serious you wanted to talk about when you got home," his mom asked cutting straight to the point. 

Obi Wan took a deep breath and asked both of them to sit down. "Are you sick son," his father asked.

"No," Obi Wan told him. "I'm not sick. You guys probably won't like what I'm about to say but I need to tell you because it's weighing heavily on me and I can't take it anymore. You guys have met and loved my roommate Qui Gon. Well, he's not just my roommate. He's my boyfriend and has been for over a year now. I have liked guys since I was in high school and now I have found my soulmate in Qui Gon. I really hope this doesn't change anything because I am still the same son that you raised and love. Just because I am in love with a guy doesn't mean I'm different." 

Obi Wan hoped that his parents might have a change of heart, but his hopes were dashed at the furious looks on their faces. 

"You can't say you're the same son we raised if you're in love with a guy," his father bellowed. 

"Did you not read your Bible or listen to the sermons in church? It's a sin to lay with another man," his mother told him in shock.

"How can it be a sin to love anyone," Obi Wan asked trying his best to hold back his tears. His parents were reacting how he expected, but he was still hurt. "Because I don't understand that. It feels right with him. I'm not going to apologize to you for having fallen in love with him. He's an incredible human being and he loves me. You should be happy that I found a guy that loves me and makes me happy."

"That's selfish thinking. You know that being gay is a sin," his father told him standing up angrily. "How dare you come in here and expect us to be ok with it when it is wrong according to the Bible!" 

Obi Wan's mom was crying. "Mom?"

"Just get out Obi Wan. Leave..." Before Obi Wan could reach the door, his mom told him to wait. "Why would you tell us this? You could have just kept it to yourself instead of bringing shame on us. What are people going to think when they find out you are gay. You are going to make us look bad at church."

Obi Wan rolled his eyes. "I told you because I needed to be free. I knew I most likely wasn't going to have your approval but it was something I had to do to feel free for me. Have nothing to do with me, I don't care. I have a family in Qui Gon. I don't need people in my life who aren't going to support me and love me for who I am. I'll let you know where you can ship my stuff!" 

His dad yelled that he was going to hell as Obi Wan walked out the door but Obi Wan acted like he didn't hear it and slowly made his way to the car.

Qui Gon sighed when he saw Obi Wan crying as he made his way to the car. "I'm going to hell because it's a sin for me to love you," Obi Wan told Qui Gon who leaned over to hug him. 

Obi Wan sighed as he felt the comfort in Qui Gon's arms. "We can do this later. I just want to get out of here. Let's go home." 

QuI Gon began driving away. He hated that he couldn't hold his lover but he had to focus on driving. "Do you regret it," Qui Gon asked Obi Wan after a little while.

Obi Wan wiped away his tears. "No. I don't. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Let them think what they want. I was only fooling myself into having hope that they would accept me. It's hard and I hurt though." 

"I can imagine love," Qui Gon told him sadly. 

Obi Wan looked at Qui Gon and couldn't help but smile. "I really love you." 

"And I love you. I wish your parents could see that there is no shame in two people of the same gender loving each other."

Obi Wan shrugged. "I don't think they'll ever see that but I can't force myself to be straight for them. I have to live my life the way I want to live it. If it means happiness with you then I'm all for it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a hard chapter to write.


	4. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Obi Wan is depressed after coming out.

When they got to Qui Gon's house, he was grateful to see that his parents hadn't gotten home from work yet. He looked at his sad boyfriend. "Do you want to go grab a quick bite before going in or what do you want to do?"

"I just want to go lay in your bed if that's alright," Obi Wan responded sadly. "I don't think I can eat anything for the rest of the day." 

Qui Gon leaned over and kissed Obi Wan's forehead. "I really wish I could do more to help you."

"You're doing fine," Obi Wan told him giving him a small smile. "I love you. Truly. You've been everything to me." The two of them got out and carried their things into Qui Gon's bedroom. Obi Wan laid down on his boyfriend's bed. Qui Gon sighed and joined him pulling Obi Wan into a warm loving embrace. "I just don't understand how this could be wrong. You are giving me everything I didn't know I'd get to experience from a lover. Before you came into my life, I thought I was going to end up forcing myself to fall in love with the least annoying female just to appease my parents. This is amazing and I hate that my parents can't see that this is a good thing for me." 

"I really am sorry and wish there was something that I could do," Qui Gon told Obi Wan doing his best to comfort him. 

Obi Wan kissed Qui Gon's cheek. "You're doing everything you can and it is everything. You're the greatest guy I've met. You've changed my life for the better. Even if it has taken a while, you have helped me be true to myself and come clean with my parents. Even if their reaction wasn't what I wanted, well, at least I feel better knowing I no longer have to hide. Even if I am going to hell." 

Qui Gon sighed and kissed the top of Obi Wan's head. "Love you." 

Obi Wan finally broke down crying and soaked Qui Gon's shirt with his tears. Qui Gon comforted his lover as best as he could. Eventually, the crying died down and Obi Wan went to sleep. Qui Gon stayed with Obi Wan until he was sure he wouldn't wake up when he moved. Qui Gon quietly got up and tucked Obi Wan in under the covers and hoped that he would get some much needed rest. Before going to get something to eat, he kissed the top of Obi Wan's forehead gently.

"Hey, is everything alright," his mom asked when Qui Gon walked into the kitchen. 

"When did the two of you get home," he asked hugging his mom.

"About an hour ago. I heard crying. What's going on?"

Qui Gon told them what happened with Obi Wan's parents. "He's relieved that he finally has it off his chest but his parents took it as expected and they want nothing to do with him. It breaks my heart and I hate it for him. I wish I could do something more."

"Oh honey," his mom told him sadly. "I hate that for him. He's such a great guy. Well, you know our offer for him to stay here is definitely still on the table."

"I know and we both appreciate it and I love you even more for it. I'm also really grateful now for how you reacted to me when I came out," Qui Gon said emotionally.

His mom hugged him again. "You aren't any different because you like guys. Nothing will change my love for you. I'm glad you found someone as great as Obi Wan. If there is anything we can do then let us know. Your father and I will be happy to help."

"Thanks mom. What is there to eat," he asked. 

She laughed and told him there was sandwich meat in the fridge. Qui Gon made a sandwich and talked to his parents a while. He went back to check on Obi Wan after 8 and found him awake and waiting for him.

"Hey Obi love," Qui Gon told him softly. 

"Hey. I'm kind of hungry now but don't really want to face your parents. Do you think that you could maybe get me something? I hate to ask, but-."

"Of course. Is a turkey sandwich fine?"

"That's perfect." 

Five minutes later, Qui Gon returned with the sandwich for his lover. "Thank you," Obi Wan told him. Qui Gon gave his cheek a kiss. 

"You're welcome. So, how are you feeling now?"

"Not so well, but it's going to take time to process. Knowing they would not accept me and hearing it, well, I just its going to take time to process, but I don't regret it. Actually, when I woke up and saw you were gone I got on my phone and updated my social media with pictures of us kissing and updated my status. So we're now social media official," he laughed. 

Qui Gon laughed. "That sounds great."

"No reason to hide anymore," Obi Wan told him.

"Yeah," Qui Gon responded with a smile. "My parent's told me to tell you if you needed anything them let them know. I know there's not much anyone can say or do at the moment but if there is, well, we're here." 

"Thank you. I appreciate it. Really. All of you are amazing and helpful."

Qui Gon leaned over to kiss Obi Wan's forehead. "We love you."

After eating, the two of them laid in bed and talked until falling asleep. The next day was harder. When Obi Wan woke up, all the feelings and memories from coming out flooded his mind and he started crying again, which woke up Qui Gon. "Sorry," Obi Wan told him crying harder.

"Don't be," Qui Gon responded. It took a few days for Obi Wan to stop crying frequently and once he got over the first few days, he was able to enjoy the rest of his spring break with Qui Gon and his family. His stuff had arrived on Friday and they spent the weekend unpacking his things in Qui Gon's room. They didn't have a spare bedroom but Qui Gon was more than happy to share his room with his lover.

"Remember, this is only temporary. Once we graduate, we'll get our own place and start our lives together," Qui Gon said as Obi Wan looked around feeling emotional. 

"I know. Just it's weird," Obi Wan told him. "But I am grateful for all of you for making this easier on me."

Qui Gon smiled at his Obi Wan and gave him a soft kiss. "Wouldn't have it any other way."


End file.
